“How big is it?” she whispered. “80 inches long and 38 inches wide.”
“It,” of course, is a twin XL bed, of which one or more resides in every Harvard dorm room. Uncomfortable, narrow, and really, really low to the ground, the beds here at Harvard are tough enough for one person to get settled in, let alone two. Having sex in these beds is difficult—thrusting your hardest while making sure your bed’s creaks can’t be heard from the Quad to the river isn’t the hottest thing in the world. Lucky for you, we are two exes who like to think we’ve perfected the art of having sex in a twin XL. Trust us, the reasons we broke up had absolutely nothing to do with our sex life. By the end of this article, your Harvard dorm is going to be home to some of the best orgasms of your life. Below are some helpful tips to get you there.
Prepare Thoroughly
Being in the mood for sex majorly improves the experience. Lighting is one of the most important elements of setting the mood in your dorm. Having sex with the lights on is a bit of a vibe killer, and having sex in pitch darkness is kinda wild. An easy fix for this is a common dorm room appliance—LED light strips. LED lights (purple ones are our personal favorite) are a happy medium.
Consider securing your mattress topper. Believe it or not, two (or more, if you’re into that) people thrashing around on a tiny bed tends to mess it up a little. The last thing you want is to be doing the deed only to be interrupted by slipping off of the bed due to an unsecured mattress topper.
Make sure your sheets are neatly tucked in under your mattress for similar reasons, allowing you to focus on the person (or people) in front of you. You might also want to put a pillow or blanket behind the headboard as a cushion. You don’t (or do, if it suits your fancy) need your suitemates hearing your bed frame banging into the wall.
Have Some Foreplay
Since the twin XL is certainly not the sexiest environment, you’re going to have to put in a bit of extra effort to prime yourself for the best sex of your life. Foreplay is critical. One thing we can recommend would be to not have both people on the bed right away. Especially for foreplay, something you could try is one person sitting or lying on the edge of the bed and the other standing or kneeling in front of them.
If someone is attracted to you, they’re going to want to hear you moan, and as well as it being hot, praise kinks are more common than you realize. If there is someone else in your dorm and you need to keep it down, covering your partner’s mouth as you’re pleasuring them is a great way to spice things up and keep the noise level to a minimum. It’s both functional and hot. We’ve definitely used that one in multiple places at Harvard (*cough* the stacks *cough*), and you can too!
Whether you want to be loud or quiet, it’s important to plan ahead. So, if you’re sexiling a suitemate, make sure to be courteous, understanding, and give advance notice. However, if you aren’t, it’s worth noting that “accidentally” having someone hear you having sex isn’t the least hot thing we’ve ever heard of (but we don’t condone this at all). In conclusion, let it loose! One of the upsides about having virtually no room in bed is that things tend to get pretty heated pretty quickly (what a great excuse to take off your clothes)!
Use the Space (or Lack Thereof)
Normally, you should start sex by centering yourselves in the bed, but this really isn’t an option for your extremely cramped twin XL. Like it or not, if you’re both getting into bed, you don’t have much of a choice other than to be on top of each other. Use that to your advantage. Eye contact, if done right, is one of the best parts of sex, and is just as hot as it is intimate. Don’t stare at your wall or ceiling while doing the deed and don’t stare deep into your partner’s soul, but intentional eye contact while having sex is a huge, huge turn-on. One other advantage the cramped space provides is that it allows you to touch your partner as much as possible. Again, you literally cannot avoid this, so please don’t try to. Before, during, and after sex, having a cramped twin XL makes sure that you and your partner are touching at all times.
Sex It Up.
We can now focus on actually doing the deed, because if you and your partner aren’t having sex at this point, you probably aren’t with the right person. This part can get a bit tricky given the bed’s narrow dimensions, but believe us, it’s totally doable, and you can use the lack of space to make things spicy. To set yourself up for success, start with the basics (missionary, cowgirl, doggie) and shake it up (speed bump, broken eagle, spider) as you get more comfortable with the less-than-ideal setting. Missionary in particular, while kind of boring, is going to be your best bet given the limited space a twin XL affords you.
As things get more aggressive, use your fear of rolling off the narrow bed (especially if you have bed risers) to your advantage: cling tightly to your partner and grab onto the bed frame for stability.
Now that you have a complete guide, none of the old excuses (“the bed is too small,” “my roommates will hear,”) will work.
At the end of the day, sex is what you make of it. No matter the setting, if you’re with the right person, your sex is going to be good…with enough practice. Just remember to follow these guidelines and happy fucking!
Justin and Selena are students who think that it’s perfectly normal for two exes to write this article together.