The holidays are a time marked by joy, togetherness, and at least a little bit of family drama. With the results of the latest election cycle looming large, political conversations this holiday season are likely to be more charged than ever, so why not lean into the chaos and make things a bit more memorable?
Do: Assume you know more than anyone else.
The key to being the champion of any holiday political debate is refusing to acknowledge that other people might have valid points or an important perspective. Who cares if your cousin majored in this topic in college or works in a related field? You read half an Instagram infographic on this issue two years ago, so it only makes sense that you’d be the loudest voice at the table. As long as you start sentences with “I’m not an expert, but…” and then proceed to confidently explain everything like you’re giving a TED Talk, no one will question your authority.
Don’t: Keep things civil.
Sure, politeness and civility are generally considered the foundation for successful family gatherings, but let’s be honest—that sounds boring. It’s best to lean into the tension; it builds character. Nothing says family bonding like shouting about the Electoral College while someone is trying to pass the dessert. Whenever you sense a lull in the conversation, it’s your responsibility to throw a conversational grenade. After all, you’re just playing your part in keeping the discussion lively.
Do: Make sweeping generalizations.
To stir the pot, a good strategy is to offer up overly broad statements and generally avoid thinking before you speak. Conversation starters like “Boomers ruined the economy” or “What’s so great about democracy anyway?” are sure to evoke eye rolls and jaw drops that will spark a heated debate. Bonus points if you make these comments while interrupting someone else or during an awkward silence. For an extra flourish, throw in an unrelated historical comparison—just enough to be provocative without making sense.
Don’t: Focus on credible sources or facts.
The dinner table is the perfect place to casually make up statistics since no one will challenge you if you’re confident enough. Pulling out your phone to verify whether something is true might seem like the responsible thing to do, but it’s guaranteed to kill the mood. Plus, why burst Aunt Betty’s bubble when she’s on a roll about chemtrails? Let her have her tinfoil hat moment. This is also the moment to cite your favorite political podcast no one listens to. These debates are about passion, not precision, so don’t let little things like facts get in the way of a bold claim.
Do: Start sentences with “You don’t understand…”
This is a great way to indicate that you’re about to offer up a point so revolutionary it will change the worldview of everyone around you. You’ll find that people respond well to condescension. This phrase is such a power move because it implies that no one at the table has ever actually thought about the issue before, and you’re the only person who has dared to explore it. It’s also a solid conversation filler that gives you a couple of extra seconds to think about what you’re going to say next. “You don’t understand…” is best delivered with a longing stare into the distance and a slow, disappointed shake of the head.
Don’t: Bring up local politics.
Is it true that as a citizen, you can have a lot more political impact on the local level? Maybe, but for the dinner table, it’s not as exciting as focusing on national or global issues—preferably the most polarizing ones. Your city council’s zoning regulations or recycling initiatives may have a more significant impact on your life, but they’re not great fodder for debate over the holidays. It’s best to pivot toward more complex issues over which you have little to no control, like inflation and foreign policy crises.
Do: Play devil’s advocate for no reason.
You may find that you and your family largely agree on many key issues, but what’s the fun in that? This is your time to slyly smile and say, “To be fair…” before defending an insanely controversial, ridiculous take. When you receive the pushback you deserve, give the most incredulous look you can conjure before throwing up your hands and exclaiming, “I’m just saying!” The art of playing devil’s advocate lies not in providing a neutral, logical perspective, but instead in how far you can push the discussion until someone explodes.
Don’t: Let anyone “agree to disagree.”
It’s best to play out arguments until people are storming off, clutching their pearls, or threatening to remove you from the family group chat. Tabling the conversation when things are just getting heated is certainly the safe choice, but it’s essentially an admission of defeat. Everyone should leave the table more fired up than when they sat down. Lean into the chaos, let the grudges form, and remind yourself that the holidays are all about creating memories. If all else fails, you can always wrap up the discussion with some passive-aggressive muttering and the thought that you’ve at least done your part to keep the spirit of the season alive.
Spending time with family over the holidays inevitably leads to moments when personalities and opinions collide, especially when politics are brought to the table. These moments are also a rare chance to test your rhetorical skills and see how long you can keep the discussion going before things unravel completely. Even if chaos sometimes ensues, these debates remind us of the challenges—and importance—of engaging with diverse perspectives.
Lucas Cohen-d’Arbeloff ’27 (lcohendarbeloff@college.harvard.edu) writes Arts for the Independent.