glazed walls / hazy still-shots around the room: how to slice birthday cake / spilled drink / sit by me / satin, sour patch, kisses, cables / and seconds, staggered seconds / berry adolescence / all this in black and blue air sinking, breathing / like a merry go round / these walls are warm and safe, effortless
the world is still / lights twinkling / the two intertwined beside me / still / ladle floating in punch / potato chips in frosting / untouched / the world comes at me in starts and stops / but slowly, how it’s supposed to / beautiful and out of order / a red lip / a slipping tongue / talk filled with semicolons and unfinished sentiments / half-calls home, half-used napkins, half-welded hearts / but that is okay
i tell god to go and he does / it feels easy / like floating downstream / loose / unbraced / so nice / i’ve spent my life trying to let the current take me / without dissolving, losing perspective / but there are always too many things that bother me more than they should / why peaceful existence comes down, once again, to an effort / to a science / i don’t know / but tonight there hasn’t been a word about past or future / i breathe the now in / slow and deep / my mother says that i make everything about myself / and even now it is i / thinking hard about how soft things feel / about currents / about balance / there’s only one subject here / sparkling / patterns etching themselves into my throat / scraggly / nauseating but not if i don’t think about it / there we go again, i and my sensations
the cold outside bites / so good / like chilled seltzer / like crystal / like a song i’ve never heard / like toothpaste / and metal / the smoke freezes midair, blown-up glass, before shattering on the sidewalk / the moon hasn’t fallen from the sky yet
This is about my experience at a house party after prom, during which I felt very in-tune with my senses. The sensory ways in which I experienced things are still very clear to me. This poem depicts the physicality of that night.
Abril Rodriguez Diaz (@abrilrodriguezdiaz@college.harvard.edu) writes poetry for the Independent.