Contrary to what some might expect, dating life actually does exist at Harvard. In fact, 38% of students surveyed by the Independent are currently in a relationship, and 55% wish they were in one. We then went directly to the source: couples who have been going strong since the first days of freshman year reflect on love, first impressions, and relationship obstacles. If you’re looking for some inspiration this Valentine’s Day, here’s some young love that will make you say aww, cute.
Tell me the story of how you two met.
Mitchell Saron ’23: We met twice. The first time was freshman year, on Mass Ave. It was one of the first days of school. I was with my roommate and some of his teammates. And Stephanie came up, and I thought she was really annoying, like talking a lot. I was ripping a vape. And she just held her palm out to me, and I was like, no.
Stephanie Hong ’23: Yeah, so I actually don’t even remember Mitchell from that very first night. The first night I remember meeting Mitchell was the First Chance Dance. My best friend was like, that guy, Mitchell, he’s so cute. And I was like, okay, I’ll totally go set you up then. So I go up to Mitchell and say hi, I’m Stephanie, my friend Grace is super cute, right? And he was like, “what’s your Snap?” I gave him my Snap and went back to Grace, saying, I got his Snap, and I’ll keep working on it for you, don’t worry. And then I guess I just stole him away.
Mani Chadaga ’25: Abby and I were in the same FOP group, a virtual FOP group. But we didn’t talk once during FOP. We didn’t even get a breakout room together. So they were trying to keep us apart. But then on the first day of school, we met at Annenberg game night. I sat down at a random table, looking for a board game to play. And instead, I found Abby. We talked a lot, and I’d say we instantly clicked. We talked for a very long time. At this point, my phone was at 1%, it was almost dead. I actually had to show my Harvard ID on somebody else’s phone to get into the game night. My phone was dead, and I needed to get back, so I asked Abby if I could use her phone charger. And that’s how I tricked her into spending more time with me.
Abby Miller ’25: Yeah, I thought it was pretty sketchy, but I let him in my room and let him use my charger, and we hung out with my roommate.
Andrew Chung ’25: It’s the first week of school, and we’re at Berg. I sit down next to Kelly and her friend, and I had this vegan mac-n-cheese, but I didn’t know it was vegan. So I took one bite, and it was so bad, and I just left the rest of it on my plate. Then, Kelly and her friend started making fun of me, and I was like, these girls are so weird.
Kelly Nguyen ’25: After that, I kind of forgot he existed. I said hi to him once in the street, because I recognized him from that one time, and he was like, who are you. But we met again through mutual friends a week later and became really good friends. It kinda just happened from there.
What do you like to do together for fun?
Saron: We do a lot of stuff. We always eat out. We go to Newbury a lot because my car is here. So we drive there a lot. We like to shop. And we watch a lot of movies together in my room because I have a single now.
Hong: We’re also taking a class together. It’s called the Psychology of Social Connection and Belonging. And over Covid, we took pretty much every class together.
Saron: Sophomore year, we were both here in Boston. A lot of kids in our grade were living in Airbnb’s. We made sure our Airbnb’s were always pretty close together.
Miller: We like to go to the gym together. Also, going to Annenberg. Taking walks. We like to go to Boston.
Chadaga: She likes to go to my soccer games.
Miller: Yeah. And we don’t really study together, because it’s too distracting.
Nguyen: Recently, we’ve been watching Attack on Titan.
Chung: Yeah, we watch a lot of anime together. And we like to get food.
What have been some obstacles of dating in college?
Saron: The first obstacle was when we got sent home, so we weren’t together for a while. Looking back on it, I’d say it made us a lot closer. We were FaceTiming every day for hours. That’s when I felt like our relationship got really, really close. And I feel like we would say time management because we’re always doing our sports, but honestly, it hasn’t really been a problem. She has practice in the morning, and I have practice in the afternoon. So we usually just hang out in the evenings.
Miller: Definitely time management. I feel like we don’t see each other during the day at all, because we have different friends and different classes. We really only see each other at night. So I think just having time for relationships is very hard during college and especially at Harvard.
Chung: I’m a fencer, so I’m always at practice. But last semester, I had a 9 AM class, and I had a break around 12 PM, so we’d see each other from 12-1:15 PM, and then we’d both go to our 1:30’s. We make time for each other.
How do you stay in touch over breaks?
Hong: Over Covid, we would visit each other a lot, like go to each other’s houses.
Saron: She’s from Maryland, and I’m from New Jersey, so I would usually drive up.
Hong: He would drive down to me, or I would take the bus up. We went on a couple of vacations together over Covid. This past break, winter break, was our longest time apart since we started dating, but we FaceTimed every day.
Saron: It was a month and a half of us not seeing each other, but we talked every day. Obviously, communicating and avoiding fights is harder when you’re long-distance, but we do a good job. We’ll have a conversation going from when we wake up to when we go to sleep.
Miller: FaceTiming, texting, GamePigeon.
Chadaga: I beat you in Word Hunt so much.
Nguyen: Over winter break, I was in Chicago, and he was in California. I set a few rules before we left. We agreed to FaceTime twice a week, and I told him he still had to like me when we got back.
Chung: And she got Covid, so she couldn’t travel. But we kept in touch.
What is some relationship advice you can share?
Saron: Don’t be afraid to go 100% all in if you know that person is the one. At Harvard, I feel like a lot of the people are very methodical about the decisions they make and what they want to put their time into. I’d say not to get into a relationship here and half-ass it.
Hong: Don’t put too much stress on it at first. Obviously, I had a crush on Mitchell, but I just wanted to get to know him first and be his friend. So yeah, don’t stress yourself out too much about finding someone in college or whatever. Just let it come more naturally. And have it be someone you really enjoy spending a lot of time with, someone who understands you and that you can trust.
Miller: I think having your own friends is important because then you’re not always with the same person 24/7. It’s important to not close yourself in, especially during freshman year when you want to be meeting a bunch of people and just integrating yourself into the environment.
Chadaga: Yeah, I agree. Definitely have your own stuff going on. Don’t make your whole life the other person, but you also want to show that they’re one of your priorities.
Nguyen: Andrew is really willing to work on things. If I bring something up, he listens. If I have something that bothers me, I tell him. He listens to me, and we communicate.
Chung: Kelly is very caring, and I think that’s important. She cares about everybody, all the time—even random people on the street.
Caroline Hao ’25 (carolinehao@college.harvard.edu) is definitely a romantic.