The expectation: Pitch Perfect, American Pie, Superbad. Frat bros standing over kegs. Packed dorm parties. Loud American music. The reality: “kinda awkward,” “not enough dancing,” “why are people so stinky,” and “no more Pepas, please!”
Despite being warned by friends and family or social media that Cambridge party life wasn’t all that, and that Harvard workloads might not be the most conducive to a good time, most international students were underwhelmed upon arrival and surprised by just how different from back home it proved to be. Italian international Gemma Dean ’27 said about the Harvard party scene, “Even though I had low-ish expectations, it was still lower.”
Many international students come from countries where the legal drinking age is 18, so coming to the U.S. has made them feel like children again. Teodor Malchev ’27, a Bulgarian international student, said, for the first time since he was 14, he “felt like a little boy that needed to hide from authorities.” Erik Dalaker ’27 described the change from being able to buy wine at the store in Norway to “getting moral lessons from my proctor about the dangers of alcohol” as a big shift.
These frustrations are amplified by the fact that the lower legal drinking ages abroad often lead to an even younger unofficial drinking age. In Italy, for example, the “drinking culture starts very young,” according to Gaia Negrini ’27, who explained that parents often play a role in “guid[ing] their kids through getting to know alcohol.” According to fellow Italian Matteo Cagliero ’27, starting younger means that “you get all the bad experiences out of the way, and you get to the point where you’re more educated.” Hailing from Hong Kong, Darcy Lin ’27 added, “It’s weird to come from a place where everyone knows their limits and have known them for a while to a space where people are beginning to experiment.”
In fact, most internationals were caught off guard by how new drinking was to some. Alexandre Philippe-Waysand ’27 said that compared to back home in France, he wasn’t expecting “to see people drinking for the first time, not knowing their limits, and often therefore drinking a little too much.” That leads to parties like the one Malchev recently attended, which “ended because someone was just vomiting.” Malchev said, “That did happen to me when I was in Bulgaria, but just, like, when I was in 9th grade.”
Despite their apparent newfound fascination with alcohol, Americans do not seem as interested in the parties themselves. According to Malchev, people seem more concerned by questions like “how can I get to this party” and “how can I get to the next one” than staying for the “real experience” of the party. Whereas the internationals report partying from around midnight or 1 am to 4 am or 5 am, they noticed that Americans seemed to head home at around 1:30 am (at the latest). Timi Esan ’27, from the U.K., asked the relevant question, “Why are people so lazy here?”
Not that the experience at the parties is all that great. Some internationals, like Esan, enjoy the American music and say that “people actually dance and sing” at parties here–as opposed to in the U.K., where, he says, “people are generally more conservative” and “don’t want to show how they’re feeling.” Other international students, like Negrini, missed seeing people at Italian clubs “dancing nicely, not like jumping around,” while Dean reminisced about how the music in the clubs was “always so good” because the DJs “don’t just play the song, they put in a beat and transition.” Others, like Kamil Kon ’27, hailing from Sweden, just asked for parties to “give [them] some Abba remixes.”
It’s not all negativity from the internationals, though. Cagliero ’27 admitted that he had “underestimated” Harvard and appreciated the fact that, “if you want to go out, you can.” Many internationals agreed that being in dorms instead of nightclubs cultivates a culture where partying is more about socializing and networking than anything else. Indeed, Hunter Haynes ’27, a New Zealander, explained that “there’s less social exclusion here if you’re not wanting to drink compared to back home.”
In any case, the party scene is not exactly what attracted most internationals to Harvard in the first place, so, for now, they are more than happy to enjoy the many other things the school has to offer. Nevertheless, many are cautiously optimistic about their future partying prospects. “I think it will all get better as we get older,” said Nicaraguan Alejandra Conrado ’27, “I think there’s still hope.” Hopefully, she won’t be disappointed.
Gemma Maltby ’27 (gmaltby@college.harvard.edu) and Isabelle Ravanas ’27 (isabelleravanas@college.harvard.edu) missed an international party to write this article.