Yes, it’s almost Valentine’s day, and yes, this is the Love issue. However, instead of cheerleading red roses and corny couples, this article presents the short end of that stick. Now more than ever, we should remember that everybody eventually hits their romantic “rock bottom.” Yet some hit it harder than others—it’s curious that a phrase implying a universal limit of heartbreak varies so dramatically between people. About love, some know only success, while others live like characters in a Shakespearean romantic tragedy. And so The Indy talked to students to compile their most pathetic moments. Sorting through anonymous tales of heartbreak ranging from hurt feelings to villain origin stories, we searched for answers to questions like: How low can one go? Who is down the baddest? Wait, you guys are finding meaningful and intimate relationships here? And what is true “rock bottom?”
“I bought a sports subscription so I could watch his sports games, and when I would ask him about his game after he finished playing I’d have to pretend like I didn’t already know. And we weren’t even dating.”
“The girl I loved called me to tell me she wanted to just be friends. I got hammered, remembered I had an expos essay due in two hours, and had to drunkenly write five pages through tears.”
“I had to date two men named Hunter to realize I can’t be in relationships with Republicans.”
“I pissed instead of, you know.”
“One time this guy from my high school dm’d me on instagram to get my snapchat and we started snapping. Ten minutes into talking he told me he was coming to my soccer game and showed up with a poster asking me to Homecoming (keep in mind I have never hung out with this guy nor did I really know who he was). I said yes. The next day we hung out and he ended up showing me something in his camera roll and I noticed something odd. I saw a picture of myself, then I realized he had an entire photo album dedicated to me with pictures of me taken from every social media platform. He somehow convinced me that it was a prank or something… I ended up dating him for a little bit. Until he cheated on me with someone who he also had a photo album of.”
“Having the first girl I kissed come out as a gay and the first guy I kissed decide he was straight.”
“I matched with a girl on Tinder and we started to text on the app a good bit. We really hit it off and ended up sending each other our Snapchats. She sent me a pic of her face and I sent one back. As soon as she opened it she immediately unadded me. We never spoke again.”
“My first girlfriend cheated on me and completely broke my heart. Two weeks later, the guy she cheated on me with sent me a snap of them hooking up with the caption ‘lol.’”
“I was seeing someone who was engaged for the majority of my freshman Fall and I had no clue until finals week. Thought I could fix him.”
“I spent three hours learning the TikTok “Seve Shuffle” for my girlfriend who thought it was difficult. She said she was impressed. Soon after she said we should just be friends.”
“You ever hug yourself to sleep?”
“I obsessively studied videos about how to get your ex back after my first breakup. I also made a private story with just him on it.”
“Someone who I thought loved me broke things off in October. I saw it coming but it still hit me like an avalanche. I never truly understood the person’s reasoning and the person did things that made me feel worse. I ended up saying things I shouldn’t have. Since then I have been at an all time low.”
Damn, we’re all “strong and independent” until we’re checking to see if their Snap Score has changed. Who has it the worst? Well we don’t know shit, so you decide. Just remember to have a little compassion when you kick your lonely roommate out of your double this holiday. After all, you may have just read their rock bottom.
Declan Buckley ‘24 and McGavock Cooper ‘24 are very free on the 14th.
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