Pictures comparing the vastly different weight rooms for the men and women basketball players at the NCAA’s March Madness Tournaments recently sparked controversy. Here’s how I imagine a few potential scenarios that led to this difference, ranked from least likely to most likely:
#1: Some of the athletes in the women’s tournament advocated for there to be a weight room with only one rack of weights.
#2: The men were originally supposed to play at the University of San Antonio (the location of the women’s tournament) and use the one-rack weight room, while the women were supposed to play in Indianapolis with a sufficient amount of weights. However, a senior at the University of San Antonio pulled a classic senior prank and switched the plane tickets of the two groups, causing all sorts of weight room and non-weight room chaos.
#3: Aliens.
#4: A group of pirates hijacked a truck of implements designated for the women’s tournament, leaving only one rack of weights as a sign that they mean business.
#5: A group of pirates, who are also gym rats, hijacked a truck of implements designated for the women’s tournament, leaving only one rack of weights as a sign that these pirates are in really good shape and should not be toiled with.
#6: The “rest of the weights” that “totally existed” and were in the weight room the night before the competitors got to the hotel were the center of a competition of thievery between two rival thieves.
#7:
“So we have 30 benches, 40 barbells, 300 dumbbells, 50 kettlebells, and various other gym equipment. That should be sufficient for the men in Indianapolis, right?”
“I don’t know, maybe throw in another 15 dumbbells for them.”
“I just remembered the women’s tournament. They’re going to need some of those weights.”
“Yeah, you’re right. Redirect those 15 dumbbells to San Antonio.”
#8:
“Oh my gosh, we forgot to provide a weight room for the women’s tournament. What are we going to do?!”
“Relax. What does a weight room look like anyways? A few dozen dumbbells, a few benches, and some barbells? That’s enough for 68 teams, right?”
“I mean, I know I was panicked before, but we’re the NCAA, not the Government. We can’t just toss money around like them.”
“So what, like half of that?”
“Something like that.”
#9:
“Well, it seems we’ve got everything prepared for the tournaments: men’s and women’s.”
“Hotels, Covid-19 tests, referees, access to practice and weight room facilities. All this worked out?”
“Weight rooms. Let me check that one out…yep. Says here we have weight rooms in both Indianapolis and San Antonio.”
“And they’re about the same or relatively the same?”
“More or less.”
“Sounds good to me.”
#10:
“Everything’s set for the tournaments.”
“Weight rooms? What about weight rooms? Weight rooms are the most important part.”
“It says here that we have weight rooms in Indianapolis and San Antonio. 300 dumbbells, 30 benches, 40 barbells, 50 kettlebells, and various other implements to Indiana. 15 dumbbells to Texas. Sounds good?”
“Wait a minute, this is insane. We need 350 dumbbells in Texas.”
“Good call.”
(Some of these scenarios are exaggerated. The men’s tournament weight room only had 200 dumbbells and the women’s tournament had 10.)
NCAA President Mark Emmert has since apologized for the discrepancy in men and women’s weight rooms, stating, “this is not something that should have happened and, should we ever conduct a tournament like this again, will ever happen again.” In response to outcry from athletes, public officials, and celebrities, the NCAA revamped weight rooms in San Antonio overnight, making them nearly identical to those in Indianapolis. For many who have fought for equality in sports and fought against the NCAA as an organization, this situation is an unsurprising disappointment. For those in support of the NCAA as an organization, reevaluate yourself.
Oliver Adler ’24 (oliveradler@college.harvard.edu) has never been in a weight room.