Your humble correspondent (Bill O’Reilly hasn’t trademarked this phrase yet, right?) has, throughout the course of the night, braved all sort of natural disasters, from angry shuttle drivers that wouldn’t let her on the bus to the first harbinger of the Apocalypse to fall over Massachusetts since Terry McAuliffe became a superdelegate: thundersnow. At the moment, the high-brow UC meeting consists of SAC Chair Jon Staff dancing to Digital Underground’s “Humpty Hump” around Harvard Hall 104, but I am told this is a completely serious meeting, so I’m not smiling just yet. Concerns over my identity are also arising as I slowly realize that I am here tonight to praise and poke fun at the guy I was running against merely two months ago. But- hey!- at least Sundquist doesn’t play polo, so I have no fear of him jousting into the room and impaling me anytime soon.
Super serious reporting starts now.
February 10, 2008 @ 6:56 pm
Some UC people are quickly starting to tinkle in, none of whom I recognize. AWKWARD. If they move to remove me from the premises, I counting on Jon Staff to rule everything dilatory.
February 10, 2008 @ 6:57 pm
Matt Sundquist just walked in to “Hail to the Chief”. This is all too real.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:00 pm
In the interest of professionalism, DJ JT Staff is playing “Get Low”, apparently some sort of UC anthem.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:01 pm
EC chair Michael Taylor says something about the “election process falling apart”. Hm, reminds us of a certain event in Qdoba during the UC election this past year when a certain polo player and his crony offered burritos in exchange for votes.
Nope, no bitterness here.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:03 pm
Randall Sarafa has just entered the building, to no song in particular. Well, to some emo song. Irrelevant. Something about his black coat and awesome blue striped button-down is making a bit of a fashionista out of me.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:04 pm
MATT SUNDQUIST: “I AM GOSSIP GEEK”
you heard it here first.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:07 pm
It appears that there is a dress code for UC meetings, and only half of the UC respects it. These reps are wearing everything from sweatpants to fancy button-downs. But I thought they all took this seriously?
February 10, 2008 @ 7:09 pm
I’ve been here about 20 minutes and have been accused of being Gossip Geek about the same amount of times. Did you guys not get the memo? YOUR PRESIDENT is behind everything! It’s obviously a conspiracy to improve their image!
February 10, 2008 @ 7:10 pm
In other news, I’ve been here 20 minutes without using the word “fuck”. Randall Sarafa just made me break the winning streak by accusing me of being Gossip Geek. I guess you can take the girl out of New Jersey…
February 10, 2008 @ 7:10 pm
OFFICIAL MEETING STARTS NOW
February 10, 2008 @ 7:11 pm
Ryan Petersen’s car got towed in NYC, which means Matt, as VP, will swear in Randall, and then EC chair Mike Taylor will swear Matt in, and then apparently Jon Staff will swear Mel McGowan in, who will swear Andrea Flores in? I’m confused.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:12 pm
Randall is officially the new UC VP. Hooray!
February 10, 2008 @ 7:14 pm
Randall begins his thank yous. Annie Riley is gangsta (“she kept it real”), Ryan Petersen is in jail or his car got towed or… something embarrasing, and Lori Adelman is… there.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:15 pm
Transparency and communication: the UC’s version of “hope” and “change”.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:16 pm
In the blink of an eye, Randall has made turned his speech from an Oscar-award-winning list of names to a high school faculty advisor’s harangue on being responsible about your extracurriculars. Apparently no one on the UC checks their email?
February 10, 2008 @ 7:16 pm
That’s it?
February 10, 2008 @ 7:17 pm
Matt is now taking his oath. He was officially out of office for 20 seconds, and recognizes that they were “relaxing”.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:19 pm
Matt is dead set on bringing up concrete UC points, in slight contrast to the more morals-oriented speech Randall gave. I can’t believe I just said “moral” and “UC” in the same sentence- a sign of the times?
February 10, 2008 @ 7:19 pm
Mental health services- I wonder if this comes up in particular because I’m here.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:20 pm
Matt decides it’s important to bring up the fact that, as a philosophy major, this is the closest thing to a job he will ever have.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:21 pm
What are those neon yellow cell phones that all the UC reps have? Maybe they should’ve sent someone a little more knowledgeable about the actual UC than Ron Paul’s campaign inspiration to liveblog this. (The blimp was my idea!)
February 10, 2008 @ 7:21 pm
Matt and Randall don’t want to sponsor legislation. Ever.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:22 pm
Everything about the college- ever- will be handed out at the next UC meeting. In the form of a flow chart, because text is a little too representative, and representation is violent.
In other words, this regime is totally postmodern all the way.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:23 pm
Matt: by ‘honesty’, I mean, I have no idea how parli pro works, but neither do you!
February 10, 2008 @ 7:24 pm
Matt ends his speech with “I’m excited!”
So are we, Matt. So are we.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:25 pm
There are “Special” elections happening all over the place, which means there are no reps here. Except there are like 30 of them.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:26 pm
The new reps introduce themselves, so we know who to blame when we have to stay another three hours because someone gave their vote to a different rep.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:27 pm
Jon Staff talks about Ad Board reform with an unidentified book in his hand. I have a hunch it may be the Communist Manifesto. Or Robert’s Rules. Same thing.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:28 pm
The SAC has not met, but has done a lot of work without meeting. Oh, wait, Jon says they have met, despite the fact that he just said he didn’t.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:29 pm
Telling people to tell you when you’re doing a bad job is a dangerous path to take, Jon.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:30 pm
Randall is falling asleep; the random guy next to him is probably on gchat.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:30 pm
Oh, nevermind. Randall is up.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:31 pm
Matt is doing his self-proclaimed idiosyncratic pencil twirling, which is much more interesting than Ad Board reform.
God I would’ve been the end of this organization. You all made the right choice.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:33 pm
Sorry! Harvard wifi directly intercepted this exclusive coverage. I was too busy freaking out about my internet to hear what committee Randall Sarafa is chairing, but it sounded fascinating.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:34 pm
Oh! Mental health awareness. And the HoCos are going to be consulted- hooray! Matt and Randall are already way better than Ryan and… Matt.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:35 pm
Matt is planning a “diversity” discussion (?)
February 10, 2008 @ 7:36 pm
Matt talks cable TV now. Matt and ex-SAC chair Mike Ragalie went around the Houses trying to get cable TV through computers and some weird WiFi system (Currier was supposed to be the guinea pig for this). Apparently they were told that a study they had no access to said that cable was an impossibility. That’s the faculty’s way of saying “no, just because we don’t want to”.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:37 pm
I’m really intrigued by the neon yellow cell phones.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:37 pm
Mike Ragalie has a question! And the question is “congratulations guys!”
February 10, 2008 @ 7:38 pm
Actually, the question is about John Dowling (sp?) coming to talk to the UC about its futility on its 25th anniversary. He should be coming to the meeting next Monday.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:38 pm
But there is no school Monday.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:39 pm
Matt will not editorialize on Dean Smith’s motives.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:40 pm
Matt is now editorializing on someone else’s motives, who is displeased with what is happening with the UC in the past year (party grant debacle, etc) and sent an angry rant to Dean Smith. And then Matt says that Dean Smith agrees with that.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:41 pm
The comments period is ominously silent.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:42 pm
The UC will now nominate a secretary. Kyle Krahel, outgoing secretary, will now speak about how awful it must be to be writing down every word of every meeting. Hell, I’m trying to do it once and I’ve already failed, though I guess secretaries don’t have to be witty.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:43 pm
Something crazy is now happening that involves Randall Sarafa and lined paper.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:44 pm
Two people have been nominated, but Matt has already told one of them (Maya- I’ll figure out who you are later) to give their acceptance speech.
February 10, 2008 @ 7:45 pm
And now, I have to go fail at being witty somewhere else- goodbye faithful UC! You’re in good hands, really.