A Love Letter to Bedrotting

In the midst of late-night Lamont sessions and 9 a.m. lectures, I find myself returning more and more to the one thing that is always there for me when I need it the most: the longest and most stable relationship I have ever had—bedrotting. A phrase popularized through TikTok, bedrotting involves spending extended periods of time in bed while engaging in passive, thoughtless activities such as watching TV or scrolling online. 

Our honeymoon phase started around seventh grade during the pandemic. When there was no need to leave our rooms or get out of bed, I started to appreciate the intricate art of bedrotting, which, when balanced carefully with other activities, can be a beautiful way of decompressing and taking care of yourself. While bedrotting can sometimes be a clingy and overbearing partner, we are now learning to set our boundaries. Bedrotting is the friend you call after a breakup, the companion who comforts you after a loss, and the one who promises to care for you in sickness (surrounded by tissues and cough drops) and in health (as you snooze your alarm for the tenth time on Monday morning). 

How could you say no to a few hours spent in the warmth of your comforter, the softness of your pillows, and the background hum of Instagram reels or trashy television? There is a simple joy in being still, having nowhere you need to be—nowhere but your bed. After a long day, it is hard to find motivation for something “productive” like working on an essay, a p-set, or going to the gym. Sometimes, you just need a moment to lie in bed and unwind, reminding yourself that you deserve to rest after working for so long. 

Like all loves, bedrotting can turn toxic when it takes up too much of your time. It is addictive to want to never leave your bed, especially as the weather grows colder and fall fades into winter. Seasonal depression makes it even harder to find motivation, to get up, to go out, to attend class. Bedrotting becomes dangerous when it consumes you. Napping, scrolling, or binge-watching are not harmful when done in moderation, but because they give your brain a break, it is tempting to only do these things, creating a cycle of falling behind, falling asleep, and falling into bad habits. 

It is a domino effect most of us have experienced. Social media has turned bedrotting into a generational phenomenon, so that even after the pandemic and life returned to normalcy, emotional exhaustion and burnout remained. Social media plays both a negative and positive role in how we view bedrotting. It glorifies grind culture and normalizes rest-free days through “day in a life” videos, for example. However, it has also led people to normalize rest and self-care. 

Social media can also play a role in the toxicity of too much bedrotting. You tell yourself you will spend five more minutes on Instagram or TikTok. When your screen-time limit pops up, you mindlessly press “remind me in 15 minutes.” 15 minutes turns into an hour, and suddenly you have spent an hour doing nothing. You finally put your phone down and go to sleep, only for your alarm to ring five hours later. Exhausted, you skip your morning lecture to stay in bed, indulging yourself because it feels so good in the moment. Many of us, myself included, do not realize when the relationship has turned toxic—it still feels comforting, even as it quietly drains us. We focus on the pleasure of our bed and forget the cost of too much time spent in it. 

So how do we find balance? Individuals at and beyond Harvard find it difficult to admit that bedrotting might be a guilty pleasure. With overflowing G-Cals and overdue assignments, students rush from one commitment to the next without a pause. The perfect balance of rest and work looks different for everyone, but it is important to trust yourself, to know when to pause and when to restart. Because of our campus’s bustling culture, it is important to give more attention to tending to ourselves through the art of bedrotting and prioritizing self-care. 

Some may argue that bedrotting is a waste of time. I would argue the opposite: it is your body’s way of telling you to rest. It is never a waste to recharge by doing something mindless. Spending half an hour, or even an hour, bedrotting can leave you far more energized and productive afterward. Instead of fighting sleep while forcing yourself to work, spend that hour in bed, under the covers, doing whatever makes you feel good and rested. You will emerge rejuvenated and ready to face the day. 

While our relationship has had its ups and downs, I have learned to make time and space for bedrotting amidst the busyness of everyday life. Bedrotting has taught me a simple yet underappreciated truth: you are allowed to take time for yourself. You do not always have to be doing something just because everyone else is. You can take a pause. Consider this your gentle reminder: you deserve to find love and rest, and you may just find both in the art of bedrotting.

Audrey Wu ’29 (audreywu@college.harvard.edu) is comping the Harvard Independent.