We Want YOU: The Sexiest Politicians

The most important part of a politician is not, of course, their beliefs, but how hot they are—and some clear, sexy front-runners stand out on the ballots around the world.

Vladimir Putin

CC: Putin may be one of the more controversial picks, but trust me on this one: the entire country of Russia agrees. Aside from election win after election win (how could that have happened?), Vladdy has consistently shown Russian women what their man could be like—just listen to the 2002 Russian propaganda pop song “A Man Like Putin”! As the song describes, Putin is “full of strength,” “doesn’t drink,” and “won’t make you sad.” What’s not to love?

GG: This is genuinely absurd. I have never heard a worse take in my life. It’s not just that he isn’t exactly a shining example of a morally sound politician (if those even exist), but he’s also just unattractive. He kind of reminds me of an angry old owl. Young Putin also looks like a young Hailey Bieber, which I am not a fan of—duck lips and dead eyes just don’t do it for me.

Gavin Newsom

CC: While I am not a fan of his politics by any means, he does look amazing in a suit. Although he has some interesting takes about the state of the unhoused, his anti-Trump rhetoric just makes him all the more sexy. He has the classic charismatic smile of all our favorite political icons: John F. Kennedy ’40, George W. Bush MBA ’75, and Bill Clinton.

GG: This might be a niche pull, but Newsom looks like Hrithik Roshan, a Bollywood star who was a fan favorite of mine as a child. There’s a certain villainous twinkle in his eye that just draws me to him. And as a Californian, I’ve never felt more patriotic than when he was trolling the President.

Dr. Abdul El-Sayed

CC: One word: Irresistible. I think people need to stop calling Dr. El-Sayed “evil Mamdani” (he just happens to be a Muslim guy, come on, everyone…) and truly give him his flowers. Not only does he have an amazing smile, charisma, and wit for days, but he is also every brown grandmother’s dream (including mine). A doctor, a politician, and educated on social issues: what more could you ask?

GG: To agree with CC, I dislike that he’s always seen as a knockoff of Mamdani. They aren’t even the same type of brown! But he’s still truly one of my favorites on this list. As a former debater, I’m attracted to his argumentative prowess—along with his sparkling smile and massive biceps. His uniform of black V-necks doesn’t hurt either (yes, I’m attracted to Elizabeth Holmes—sue me).

Zohran Mamdani (shoutout to his more attractive wife)

CC: I wish I could write about Rama Duwaji here, but alas, we can mention her less attractive but still lovely husband: Zohran Mamdani. Who knew America was attracted to democratic socialism and politicians that don’t use your tax dollars for private jets (hint: we did)? His recently departed mustache will be forever missed, but who could say no to those cheekbones?

GG: Like CC, I love Rama Duwaji, but I have room in my heart for Zohran too. His friendly demeanor and cheeky quips just make him so lovable, and although socialism is a bit spineless, he wears it well. Plus, I’m a sucker for a smile!

Kamala Harris

GG: I have BEEN a Kamala supporter, not of her politics, but of that beautiful face. She was also right about the coconut tree—we exist in the context of everything we live in. I personally miss her short curls; they were really doing it for me. Fun fact: my old boss used to work with her, and I’ve been lucky enough to view previously unseen photos of her when she was young and lit. You should all be jealous!

CC: I have grown to love this take. Kamala Harris has aged with immense grace, but before her stint as Vice President and her run for president, young Kamala Harris was truly a sight to behold. Her makeup and hair were always on point, and her best feature, her smile, still beams today.

Emmanuel Macron

GG: This is my Vladimir Putin—my international, insane, but oddly attractive old white man. He seems to be perpetually furrowing his brows, but I’m kind of into it. And I know his hairline isn’t doing him any favors, but I’m willing to let it slide because of his strong jawline and big nose. (You know what they say about big noses!)

CC: Horrible take! This man is as chopped as his politics. His carefully styled hair may conceal his receding hairline, but this is a message to all the French: time is running out for your temporarily hair-clad president. As his country’s politics swing right, he slips into more and more ill-fitting suits (and sometimes his wife’s palm). I hate to disagree with GG, but I will never get behind this.

Angela Alsobrooks

CC: This woman may have some of the prettiest eyes I have EVER seen. Her hair is always styled perfectly, and her personal style shines through regardless of the event. I truly enjoyed researching her because, in every photo, her energy is bright, intense, and fabulous.

GG: I admire female senators, and I love a woman with class. Angela has all of those, and her consistently flawless base and styled hair certainly do not hurt. Her kindness and passion, along with her chic hanging earrings, give her an elegance you can’t miss.

Manny Rutinel

GG: I ADORE him. He’s honestly perfect, from his face to his body to his curly hair. With his tan skin and his kind eyes, his political advertising should just be photos of his face. I know I’d vote for him! His only flaw is being a former Bulldog.

CC: I will have no criticism of this take. Make America Hot Again (sorry, RFK, MAHA means something else now). He’s young, fit, handsome, and he looks phenomenal in a cowboy hat—what’s not to love?

We hope you enjoyed reading about our desire (and disgust) for these local, national, and international leaders—maybe you’ve found a new ballot box crush! But please don’t let a politician’s sexiness determine your vote, although being attractive certainly makes some of their policies suddenly sound so convincing.

Capitol Craver and Government Glazer might be found clerking for one of the politicians on this list.